The Tear Jerks - Live @ Club DGBD

One of the most unexpected things that has happened since arriving in Seoul is that I have joined a band, the Tear Jerks. To make a long story short, I randomly met this Irish bass player named Cain upon discovery that he needed a drummer for a punk band. Luckily, he knew of a practice space with its own drum set. So, one Sunday in mid-October, I headed over to Itaewon, met the rest of the band, and practiced with them for a couple of hours. Almost two months later, we landed a gig (thanks to Cain) opening for a korean psychobilly band called the Rock Tigers. Fast forward to last Saturday and the moment of truth was finally upon us. Here is a shot of my three band mates:

From left to right: John (Guitar), Shawn (Vocals), Cain (Bass)

And here's me:

Since we haven't even been playing for two months, we only have seven songs that we knew with enough confidence to play. So we plowed through our set in about 25 minutes and, before I knew it, I was hopping off the stage wishing we could do it all over again. Luckily, the crowd really seemed to like it. Perhaps it is because all of our songs are about drinking and/or fighting. Most of the people in the crowd were doing the former and had probably, at one point, done the latter. There were many attempts for me to take my shirt off during the show, though I refused. All in all it was one of the best experiences I've had so far in Korea. Fortunately, the fun isn't over yet. We have another show this upcoming weekend at a place called Club FF, so I'm very excited about that. We're playing Club FF on New Year's Eve as well. 

My friend Courtney took some video of last Saturday's performance, so I will try and post that if I can get ahold of it. Until then, here's a nice shot of the top of my head. Thank God I'm not balding...yet.

A brief look at R. Kelly

I first became fascinated with R. Kelly when I was introduced to "Trapped in the Closet" while visiting a friend at Harvard (irony?). Somehow we managed to watch the first twelve chapters and, as I sat there afterwards, reflecting on my experience, I could not help but think that my life was entering a new era: the "Post-Trapped in the Closet" phase. Fortunately I had overestimated the video's effect on my perception of reality and my daily life continued more or less as expected. The only noticeable difference was that I now found myself thoroughly intrigued by all things R. Kelly. Who is this man? What goes on inside his head? Is he actually serious?

My quest for answers to these questions has only increased the mystery surrounding the man and his music, though it has lead to some fairly interesting discoveries. The first being this:



Second, my love of deep cuts is no secret and R. Kelly's catalogue has some real hidden treasures. Songs like Sex Weed, Kickin' It With Your Girlfriend, Sex In the Kitchen, Tryin' To Get A Number, and The Zoo are prime examples of R. Kelly's provocative, lewd, and often baffling song-writing.

A few examples:

Girl you're in the kitchen

Cooking me a meal

Something makes me wanna come in there and get a feel

-from "Sex in the Kitchen"

Girl, I got you so wet
It's like a rain forest
Like Jurassic Park
Except I'm your sex-a-saurus baby

-from "The Zoo"

Girl you got that sex weed
I just want to hit it all the time
Sex so good that it gets me high
Bring that home grown to me

-from "Sex Weed"

*I have to note at this point that, upon proof-reading this post, I noticed that all three of those quotes begin with R. Kelly addressing his female counterpart as "girl." In a perfect world, this would eventually become a poetic device forever linked to the genius of R. Kelly. So if in 50 years some new R&B singer begins a verse or chorus with "girl," scholars will note that this verse is very 'Kellian' in nature. That is, assuming that there will be R&B scholars in the future. Again...perfect world scenario here.

The most fascinating aspect of R. Kelly as a song-writer is that he appears to be dead serious. The 'Real Talk' video and the lyrics above could easily have come from some comedian satirizing modern R&B or simply just trying to get a laugh. However, R. Kelly writes songs comparing sex to marijuana or a burning desire to toss his girl's salad without so much as a hint of sarcasm. His new album, 12 Play: Fourth Quarter, is set to be released in early 2009, and with song titles such as "Wanna Make a Baby," "Freaky Sensation," and "Playas Get Lonely," it promises to be a good one.

a Haiku for O.J.

In honor of O.J. Simpson's recent conviction, my good friend Khiet Chhu wrote a haiku that I would like to share with my reader(s). 

He only wanted
To get his things back from them,
But he used a gun.

...oops

Kkangpae: The Korean Gangster

After a brief gchat discussion with a friend about gangs in Korea, I decided to do a little research. The Korean gang scene is not something that I have given much thought before today, probably because Seoul is the safest place I have ever lived (Cape Cod included). The worst thing that could possibly happen to me is getting into a bar fight with another westerner, which I don't foresee in my immediate future. 

Anyway, I began my quest by searching 'Korean Gangs' on google. Nothing really exciting turned up. So I tried 'Korean Organized Crime.' This search eventually lead to the discovery of 'KKangpae,' the Korean word for 'Gangster.' A Wikipedia search revealed a brief history of Gang Life in Korea, but nothing too exciting. 

Organized crime is the name of the game in Korea. Street gangs have never had much of a presence, but the Korean mob had a fairly good run in the 1960s-80s. The Korean mob works pretty much like any other mob: specializing in extortion, prostitution, money laundering, kidnapping, sale of illegal goods, and owning nightclubs. In the 1990s, the Korean government decided to finally crack down on the K-mob and did a surprisingly thorough job. Now, the K-mob scene is fairly non-existent, especially in big cities such as Seoul and Busan, where most of the organized crime of earlier decades took place.  Surviving on the fringe of Korean society, the gangs work out of small cities now, where there is little threat of police interaction. 

Organized crime may be a dying force in the ROK, but apparently there is a large presence of Korean-American gangs in many US cities. According to Wikipedia, Los Angeles and New York have a significant amount of Korean-American organized crime rings and smaller street gangs. Other cities such as Chicago, Philly, Miami, Seattle, and even Dallas have seen a significant amount of Korean gang activity.

Wikipedia also notes that Korean-American gangs are unique in the fact that there is a very strict system of rank based on age. Also, binge drinking is an important method of bonding between Korean gang members. Interestingly enough, this is pretty much exactly how Korean businesses work too. I guess some cultural traits transcend both space and legality.

My typical dinner

On Monday-Thursday, I generally eat my dinner sitting at my small black table, admiring the bustling night traffic and glittering city lights that appear through my window, and listening to whatever music happens to be playing from my computer that is most likely perched on top of my air conditioner. If I am too lazy to prepare anything, I have my choice of about 25 different restaurants without even stepping foot outside.

My typical self-prepared meal is far different from previous "Cooper Staples." However, I have grown to love my little K-meals, and already dread the day when Kimchi is not readily available as that ubiquitous side dish. About 90% of my meals consist of four things. The first, and perhaps most important part of any Korean meal, is the rice. My rice is grade-A sticky white rice straight from the source...my rice maker:

I also have kimchi, seaweed wrap, and what I shall refer to as the "wild card" dish. There is nothing exciting about the wild card, it is just simply the only dish that ever changes. In the picture below, you will note that the "wild card" from tonight's dinner was two scrambled eggs. The bowl in the middle is a serving of delicious rice. Behind the rice is a tray full of seaweed wrap, which I use to wrap up various combinations of rice, kimchi, and egg. That giant container of what looks like vomit is, in fact, Kimchi. Obviously I will not consume the entire plastic tub in one sitting. Actually, it takes me over a month to consume an entire tub of Kimchi. Despite it's outward appearance (especially in this photo), Kimchi is actually quite delicious. The Kimchi you see below comes from the E-Mart in my building. 

So there you have it...my average dinner. It may not look very appetizing, but I assure you that my makeshift Asian meal rivals anything that I used to whip up back in America.

Korea's Singing Highway

My prediction: Korean record companies are going to start buying out sections of highway so that they can pump the latest k-pop single. That way, you can never escape it's bubble gum grip.

On Egg Nog, Beer, and Charlie Brown

The day after Thanksgiving officially marks the beginning of the Christmas season for most Americans (though a quick stroll through a shopping mall would have you believe that the kickoff happens sometime closer to Halloween). This is also the day that I officially allow myself to begin to listen to Christmas music and indulge in any kitschy holiday films or TV specials I happen to enjoy. Granted, I used to watch the Rudolf Christmas Special in the middle of July back in the simpler times of my youth, but I'm older now, more prone to cynicism and apathy. Thus, I have to set strict guidelines for myself.

The Christmas season, in many ways, operates much like a Microbrewery. There are a whole list of traditions, foods, beverages, decorations, songs, movies, etc. that are only supposed to surface during the months of November and December. Egg Nog is a great example of this. Kudos to the dairy companies of America for strictly adhering to the unwritten code of Egg Nog consumption. Though almost nothing is sacred in this modern, drug-crazed and porn-soaked era of ours, at least companies such as Hood and Garelick farms still know the value of tradition and understand that Egg Nog is only to be consumed during a specific time of the year. Imagine...Egg Nog in August. All decency would be lost. Children would be impregnating their parents. John Madden would travel by airplane. The Drew Carey Show would be back on the air. Total Chaos.

However, I digress. Back to the Microbrew analogy. Imagine that your favorite beer is a Long Trail Harvest, a delicious amber ale that goes down smooth during those crisp autumn days in Vermont. This particular beer is only available during the months of August through December or January, depending on when the final batch is gone. Now, bottled beer is still drinkable for at least six months. So if this happens to be you favorite beer, you could easily buy a case or two, store it in your closet, and break it out in May to the envy of all your friends. 

The problem with this hypothetical scenario is that there is something inherently special about seasonal beer. That moment when Harvest Ale first hits the shelves at your local liquor store is a magical time. That first sip is not only delicious, but also telling. When those hops tango with your taste buds for the first time in nine months, you know that summer is ending, the leaves are about to change, and the days are getting shorter. The fact that a beer can have that effect is one thing that makes seasonal brew such a great part of beer culture. Drinking a Harvest Ale in June would, quite simply, ruin that effect. When the beer hit the shelves that following August, it would cease to be anything but a good-tasting beer. Your taste buds would still be happy but there would be no sense of seasonal romanticism, which I imagine is a terrible loss.

Like Long Trail Harvest, Christmas, and the endless amount of baggage that comes with it, should only be enjoyed during a specific time each year. Some may believe that time begins in November. Others, like me, may choose to partake once Thanksgiving is over. That's freedom...that's America. Anybody who puts up decorations or dusts off the Bing Crosby records before November however, should be publicly ridiculed. 

So, as another Christmas season begins, and one that will no doubt prove to be the strangest in my short history on this planet, I look forward to enjoying those personal traditions I hold close to my heart. Will they have Egg Nog in Seoul? Maybe. Will I get to kiss a pretty Korean girl under the mistletoe? Probably not. Will I stroll through Myong-dong, enjoying the lights with the soundtrack to A Charlie Brown Christmas streaming through my headphones? Most definitely.